iPhotography · Prompts

Density on the Horizon

It was Sunday night, I was making the trek from Ohio to Kentucky. I was 3 hours into my trip when I noticed the weather start to shift. The wind howled across the fields on either side of the highway. Needing both hands on the steering wheel as the sky got darker and darker. The density of the clouds grew. Gorgeous deep colors of blues, greys and purples.  My radio had been turned down so I could see better. (Seriously, we all do it! Don’t judge!) The white noise that was my car pacing the cars around me along with the steadily growing wind was pierced with the sound of tornado sirens. My phone weather app also began to screech- informing me I needed to seek shelter immediately.  The rain and hail had stopped a couple miles back. Everything around me seemed to calm, yet there was a tension you could cut with a knife. Just then, as I looked over to my right, I saw it. The forming of a massive funnel. The clouds swirling into formation like some kind of deadly dance.



This weeks photo reel is in response to The Daily Blog’s Photo Challenge prompt “Dense” – my apologies for the quality. Taken going nearly roughly 65 on the interstate battling 70+ mph winds while looking for a place to pull over!

Coffee & Chaos

Coffee & Chaos

Another Monday, but this time- in a totally different state! I am away for work this week, and because of this, my weeks outlook is absolutely different than most weeks. While it feels amazing to be typing this from actual work instead of my remote office, I can already tell it’s going to be one hell of a week!

CoffeeANDChaos2Monday Mindfulness
Surreal. I feel like I’m not really here. Like the noise is so loud it’s seems silent. I feel like I am out of body looking in. 

This Weeks Intentions
– To remain level-headed
– To not allow decisions to be made while extreme emotions of any kind are present
– To leave in a better state than I came

This Weeks Goals
– To kick as much ass as possible while physically at work
– To finally close the open chapter of my life’s book
– To RELAX (ha, yeah..okay..)

I would love to hear about your intentions and goals this week- even just your Monday mindfulness! Pingback to my Coffee & Chaos page, or this post so I can see it!

Broken Heart Chronicles · Chronic Illness

The Broken Heart Chronicles Part VII

17793326_434771636868876_971036822_nThis was hands down the worst it has been. The pain shot through my chest so fast and hard it was like I had been electrocuted. I got dizzy and my vision went blurry.

This was one of those moments where I didn’t have the second thought of “ehhh, I’ll wait and see”, I auto pilot called my mom to come sit with my son without thinking twice as I cautiously packed a bag to head to the hospital.

Arriving at the ER, as soon as they hooked me up for an EKG they saw it was an “irregular EKG”. Noticing my RBBB immediately and my resting heart rate of roughly 120bpm as soon as the sensors we on me, the doctor came in right away to order blood and get a background. The usual flow of things.

This time though, a brand new symptom appeared. My oxygen. My oxygen levels kept dropping to around 92. I was told by the Nurse 95 is a concern and 97 is the lowest that is “acceptable”. I don’t smoke, I don’t drink. I’m young. I’m active. So in went the horrible oxygen tube. I swear I could feel the air blowing behind my eyeballs. Worst feeling EVER!

The Nurse kept giving me the “you poor thing look”, as the doctor came back in and declared all my blood work was just fine (minus my 1 point too low potassium level). Which we knew would happen. It always happens. They can see my tachycardia-like heart racing and my RBBB, they can see I have every. single. symptom. of a heart attack minus the actual clot. I have no infections in my bloodwork. I have no clots according to my bloodwork. Everything is just fine. Except I’m dying without dying.17424962_430641690615204_4005804853538115830_n

The VA refuses to schedule me for the needed tests such a contrast CT and other tests for ruling out heart diseases, or anginas or such. I’m not a “priority” because I’m a young female so it must just be anxiety (insert a huge eye roll here). I have been scanned with a ultrasound for Mitral Valve issues- that was a negative. My lungs look and sound fine. I don’t have a single ounce of soreness when pushed on, nor does breathing or moving make it better or worse (Costochondritis is out). Ive been tested for AR and GERD with a numbing test (so nasty!) and it did NOTHING for my pain either. RAWRRRR.

The doctor had no idea what else to do with me, other than send me home and tell me to take my nitro if it didn’t get better or come back if it gets worse.

I remind you all, I go to the ER per my primary care doctor’s suggestion. We don’t know what the issue is and absolutely have no idea how life threatening or non-life threatening this is so to be safe I head to the ER- Normally the closest one to me since the VA is far away and doesn’t give a single fuck about me.

iPhotography · Prompts

Starting Fresh- A splash of green

Taken with my iPhone 7 plus with no filter or editing. 

The only real color in my flower bed is the green stalks and stems of my flowers. I have spent so much time and effort seeking out the blackest possible perennials and annuals (which yes, some still technically aren’t black- they are a deep purple that looks black). As winter turns to spring and summer- I proudly boast my sea of rich shades of night. However this year, I am heart broken. As I prepare to move- I will have to bid my flowers adieu, which means there is very little point is working my butt off to keep my precious gothic garden in bloom this spring. (I am thinking I will plant a couple porch planters though! Black elephant ears and black violas and such…) So for this weeks photo topic of green, I want to smile a bit at what I will get to see bloomed one last time this year.

This iPhotography post was inspired by the The Daily Prompt’s weekly photo prompt of “It IS Easy  Being Green”

Coffee & Chaos

Coffee & Chaos

Monday morning once again! As you know by now- I have an extreme dislike for all things morning. I need coffee strong enough to wake the neighbors just to get me to stop snoozing my alarm. I can’t hit snooze anymore, so it’s time to kick the week off with Monday Morning Coffee and Chaos!

CoffeeANDChaos2Monday Mindfulness
Restless.  I don’t know if it’s because today is the Ostara which means today is the vernal equinox, so things are shifting and balancing or what …. but the word of mindfulness today is Restless.

This Weeks Intentions
– To limit use of “extremes” (aka I’ve told you a million times)
– To be as Mindful as possible at all times
-1 word..calm

This Weeks Goals
– To get back on track with my daily Yoga, Reiki and Mindfulness.
– To be solid in my eating habits (which is hard with my lack of appetite)
– To prepare for my week in KY without the last minute craziness

I would love to hear about your intentions and goals this week- even just your Monday mindfulness! Pingback to my Coffee & Chaos page, or this post so I can see it!

Knowledge is Power · Prompts

6 St. Patrick’s Day Truths- Truth and Religion Meet

Ahhh, Saint Patrick’s Day. A day full of beer, all things green, and Irish and pride. There is a bit more to it than that though…

Who even is Saint Patrick? 
Born Maewyn Succat somewhere in British Isles near what is now Scotland around roughly
the late 300’s AD. At the time, the British Isles were technically Roman owned, and according to his published Confessio, we can trace his lineage to Roman Citizens. So…he is definitely not Irish.

So then where does Ireland come into all of this? 

It’s said that at the age of 16, Maewyn was kidnapped by Irish Pirates and taken to 17353413_426941420985231_1520601297017639752_nIreland, where he was enslaved for 6-7 years. He learned the Irish language, which aided him when he returned roughly a decade later when he claims he was called to in a “realistic dream” which he felt was from God.

What’s with the name change?
While never a big believer in Christianity-  he wrote while enslaved, he grew closer to the Christian God and his desire to “seek the truth”.  After escaping when being told to by an Angel who came to him in a dream, he returned home to The British Isles and than made his way to France where he studied under St. Germaine of Auxerre. Pope Celestine gave him the name “Patricius” which translates to Patrick- which is the name he went forth with.

Isn’t he famous for banishing all the snakes from Ireland?
Just…no. Well… not in the literal term. Ireland has actually never had snakes. It’s believed that being surrounded by water since the end of glacial period, there has been no way for snakes to make their way there. (not to mention the temperatures at that time would havePattys been way too cold for the slithery reptiles to survive the time period). Religious scholars believe the snake story is actually in reference to St. Patrick bringing Celtic Christianity across Ireland which in turn replaced pagan ideology.

So why Celebrate? 
The origin of Saint Patricks Day came from the religious celebration of his life and the (religious) changes he brought to Ireland. It’s believed that starting in the early 18th century, Irish immigrants brought the tradition over to the America which began the association of St. Patrick and Irish culture. By mind 19th century the small feast day turned into a full-blown celebration and in 1903 was so popular it became a national holiday in Ireland! Now it’s celebrated all over the world by people both Irish and non-Irish! 

What about the Traditions? 
It’s said Saint Patrick used the shamrock to explain the holy trinity as he spread his teachings. This could be because shamrocks were of the plenty and conveniently had 3 leaves which helped with his metaphor. However, there is absolutely no mention of said shamrock in his “Confessio“.  Shamrocks were linked to Ireland long before St. Patrick though. 3 was a significant number to the lj9L8v2Irish. Celtic tradition was all things happened in threes. Also, being predominately Pagans (or known as Druids) at that time, it’s said to have been used to represent The Triple Goddess or “Mother Goddess”. They also believed in the Morrigan- made up of 3 Deities . Another import figure was Brigid, (later known as Saint Brigid when Christianity took over) the Pagan Goddess of Springtime. She was the daughter of Dagda, the “Father-God” of Ireland. She represented new birth, growth, healing and unity. It was said wherever she walked clovers would appear (shamrock literally means baby clover!).  A day of Celebration for her takes place in the beginning of February to remind the people of Ireland of hope and coming spring! Fun Fact: There are wells all over Ireland named after Brigid, as it’s said she rewards any offering to her, which is where the whole “toss a penny in a well/fountain” came from! 

Green first became a thing during the rebellion against the English Crown in 1641. The original color of the order of “Saint Patrick” or the Feast Day was a light blue. The color green became known as connection with those who supported Irish independence when those leading the rebellion carried a green flag with a harp on it, instead of the usual blue erin-go-bragh-ireland-forever-5-x-3-flag-1726-p.jpgflag (color of the Crown at the time) with a harp on it. Green showed up again against the French in 1790’s when it was worn by the Society of United Irishmen. It became the color
associated with Ireland as a whole when the waves of immigrants from Ireland wore it to show solidarity on St. Patrick’s Day for their Irish Roots- thus becoming the color of Ireland!

But..But..the beer and all the food! “Feast Day” aka the Celebration of the life of St. Patrick allowed the lifting of lent rules for the day which meant you were allowed to eat and drink as much as you want. However, drinking beer didn’t become a thing until later on. Pubs were forced to close in honor of the Holiday. (Im sure that didn’t stop the drinking though!) So food and drink as become a staple of St. Patricks day in connection to what was originally known as “Feast Day”!
So there you have it! Some history of St. Patrick’s Day that not many know or even want to admit to, since religion and tradition are both touchy topics. As a Pagan- in the sense of “spiritual” not “religious”, I know most Western celebrations and holidays start from Pagan traditions, and find it fascinating how things morph over time, especially when religion and pride are involved.

This post was once again perfectly timed with The Daily Post’s One Word Prompt- Controversy as well as a topic (along with all other “Holidays”) I have spent quite sometime studying and researching as part of my Pagan studies. 

Links to some of the information sources:
Patrick’s Own Confessio (written by him, about him) 
New World Encyclopedia- Saint Patrick